:)

Jess, you're all I think about now.

Forever on my mind.

You're in my thoughts while I'm talking to another person.

For instance, I could be talking to someone about cheesecake and you'll be in my thoughts.

Its something I'm getting used to.

I keep thinking I'll see you at school, each day.

I'm always thinking I'll see you walking, down any street.

Then reality hits me again and I remember, I probably wont see you.

I get my hopes up.

I think I'm going to have an obsession with i-D magazine. It's super fantastic!

It's packed full of pictures and quirky things, and quite a few interviews with quirky/smart people. Love it!

I think I might start a journal, I like to think that if I started it now, in a few years if I'm still around since that's not promised to anyone, that I'll be able to see what I thought about things and to see if I still have the same emotions towards things that I might not have in a few years.

Also, just these last two weeks I'm starting to think that I'm actually rather smart.

I used to get people telling me how smart I was and I'd be embarrassed about it but now I actually take it as a compliment. Theres nothing wrong with being smart.

So yes, about the journal, since it's just the beginning of my 2 weeks holiday I really want to go to the shops near the beach and buy one. On saturday - tomorrow - I shall go and do that.

I really enjoy writing long blogs, I want to do this more often. It takes some weights off my shoulders.

I love how I can write what I'm thinking, it really does help me relax.

I think I'm going to have an early night tonight.

Ah, yes.

Wonderful.

Today

Second period of school was just horrible, I had a breakdown and couldn't stop crying for the rest of the day.

So I texted Mum saying I wanted to come home but she was at work so she got my Nana to come get me.

Whenever someone asked me what was wrong I'd burst out crying and say "I dont know!"

I still dont know why this happend today. Its crazy. Especially at school. I guess everything is getting to me at the moment.

My eyes are still kinda stingy from all the crying, they feel sort of swollen.

Oh, this morning was Stupid!

I got up super early like 6am and at the usual time *8am* I went outside the house with my brother and waited for the bus.

At 8.05am the bus should've arrived, but no.

Then comes 8.30am, waiting another 20 minutes for this stupid bus to arrive got us nowhere.

So Taylor and I got a ride to school with his friend Jenny.

When I got to class there was an announcement on the loudspeaker saying that there was something wrong with the buses this morning so expect a lot of late people to class.

Oh man I was so pissed off at that because its happend a couple of other times with bus drivers not doing their job. and I've had over 5 bus drivers driving the bus in the complete opposite direction it should be going in.

I hate buses anyway. I'd walk to school if it didn't take me an hour and a half to get there.